Boy oh boy, yesterday was a day of high drama in the shit flinging monkey house U.S. Congress, with a guest appearance by Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin “Bibi” Netanyahu, Israel’s version of Dick Cheney, albeit with a real heart, coming to speak. You may be wondering what brought Bibi to town? That would be an invitation by Speaker of the House John Boehner, or, just as likely, the most epic late night drunk dial in recent history.
At any rate, what we have is a GOP-led Congress failing at the only two real jobs they have — writing the laws of the land and paying the country’s bills. They used to declare war also, but lately they’ve let whoever is president do whatever they want. So, they decided to step into the president’s kitchen and piss in the foreign policy pot.
Also, by not inviting any opposition candidates to speak they have slipped their dicks into Israeli electoral politics (Bibi’s up for reelection in two weeks) which the average politically engaged Israeli voter shouldn’t find very kosher. So, what’s up with the Bibi and Boehner tongue kissing? Let’s explore.
The president embarks on delicate negotiations with the Islamic Republic of Iran. He allows his aides and underlings to do so because he is firm in his belief that in the presidency resides the sole power to conduct the foreign relations of the United States. A year or so earlier, his deputy national security advisor wrote a memo in which he said that the president “was ready to confront the Congress on the constitutional question of who controls foreign policy.” The Office of Legal Counsel in his Department of Justice argues that the president had “far-reaching discretion to act on his own authority in managing the external relations of the country.” When these negotiations are uncovered, this is the primary argument presented by the president and his defenders against the angry opposition of the Congress. The president is Ronald Reagan. The negotiations are regarding the exchange of weapons for American hostages, something the president vowed he never would do, and something he already told the country he hadn’t done … Also, in deciding to sell the arms, the president was inspired partly by a book about combating terrorism put together by an ambitious Israeli politician named Benjamin Netanyahu.
Oops, that’s not it, let me try again.
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu addressed a joint meeting of Congress on Tuesday to warn the United States that negotiating with Iran could result in a “nuclear nightmare”
A “nuclear nightmare”, right, OK then. I think the real nightmare Bibi is concerned about is the one that includes the level playing field a nuclear armed Iran would create. Imagine if the Israelis had to finally negotiate in good faith with an equal partner? Why they might have to solve that problem in Gaza. Or perhaps the Palestinians could finally get their own passports because they had a country to call their own. It could possibly have the added benefit of convincing the Saudis to stick to pumping oil rather than funding religious extremists throughout the region and the world, but that’s all just my guess.
OK, so much for navel gazing and foreign policy wet dreams. As it turns out, this whole masturbatory drama was played out in order to undermine the president’s on going efforts to negotiate an agreement with Iran as it concerns their nuclear program, rather than selling Iran weapons as a previous administration **cough** Reagan **cough** choose to do. But, then their historical memory is on par with Reagan’s memory during his second term.
All in all, this episode will be long remembered by the screaming howler monkeys that inhabit the tea party terrarium and superfund site and not so much by the rest of us. The president will continue with his program and John Boehner will still be drunk, ineffective, and orange and that’s no way to go through life, son.
