Bible banging bigot Ted Cruz was out pandering to his base this week when he stopped in to chat with National Socialist right-wing radio host Eric Metaxas about the most recent “… greatest threat we’ve ever seen.” (by “we”, he is referring to the voices in his head). What has Ted’s panties in a wad this week? (h/t to Sea Hagg)

Ted Cruz: Gay Marriage Is The Greatest Threat To Religious Freedom In American History

Sen. Ted Cruz of Texas, the Republican presidential candidate who believes that the gay “jihad” may soon lead to the imprisonment of pastors and the end of free speech, told a right-wing radio host yesterday that the legalization of same-sex marriage represents the greatest threat to religious liberty in the history of the United States.

Take a seat ISIS, you’ve been upstaged by the gay jihad.

Ok, just a minute, what in the hell does a “gay jihad” look like? I mean are we talking fabulously turned out men and women riding flying unicorns, shooting rainbows from their asses to a blaring soundtrack of Judy Garland show tunes, ala, Gaypocalypse Now? Furthermore, how do Ted’s tinfoil hat wearing, mouth breathing uber morons defend against such a force? Do they show up mixing stripes and plaids in the hope of offending their sensibilities to death? Damn, I mean really, goddamn, that is some weapons grade stupidity.

Now about this “religious liberty” bullshit, being a devout non-believer myself that phrase implies the liberty to keep your beliefs to yourself. I realize, however, that is not the accepted definition. It does occur to me though that the more rational population of believers and leaders might want to rescue that phrase from the GOP, because aggressively pursuing the right to discriminate behind a veil of faith is really poisoning the well among the majority of us who don’t care if two people in love want to marry.

You know, I don’t understand the GOP plan. Here they are aggressively offending the gay community, women, non-white voters, and the thinking segment of the population, to what end? Is it to prove that even stupid people can win elections? Nevermind, my opening sentence proved that point. We are so screwed.